True love is not a fairy tale or a game. There is certainly no such thing as love at 1st sight. Realistically, that is just shallow notion and all about the physical appearance of a person. You can’t truly love someone you do not know and you can’t know someone just by simply looking at that person.
Although I have learned a lot of life-changing love and relationship lessons throughout my relationship, here are the six most valuable lessons I’ve learned.
Truly loving someone means you must acknowledge that he or she is not perfect and will eventually make mistakes.
Let’s face it; you are not perfect yourself and will more than likely make mistakes in the relationship too. Guaranteed, there will be hard times and there will be fights – there will be days when you can’t even stand to look at each other. That doesn’t mean your relationship is doomed though. Couples who are prepared to go the distance don’t look away from taking on topics that could just as easily be swept under the rug. They ask the tough, daunting questions as soon as possible before it becomes a bigger issue in the relationship later on.
Keep talking and do not shut down, especially during the tough conversations.
Not seeing eye to eye on every topic does not mean you’ve stopped loving each other. Even the little arguments over stupid things can enhance your relationship. Love each other enough to find common ground, make a compromise and agree to disagree. Remain a team, no matter what. Be open to change; the longer you avoid change, the harder it will be to make necessary changes.
Never try to make your partner the enemy and never keep score.
One of you will not always be right. One of you will not always be wrong. When you are wrong, take responsibility and make amends. When your partner is wrong, be humble enough to forgive. As the ‘Karma Chameleon’ song lyric goes, ‘you’re my lover, not my rival.’ If you are looking for a competition, don’t take it out in the relationship, join a bowling league or baseball team.
Being your own person while in a relationship is a vital part of making it work.
Despite the popular beliefs, you and your partner are not one unit and you do not complete each other. No one completes you but you! Having your own friends and interests will make you a better partner. Find your own ways to be happy and spend time. Do not expect your partner to entertain you all day. Most couples cannot and do not want to spend every waking moment together and that is okay. It may work for couples who are business partners, but it is extremely rare.
True love is about wanting to stay even when the situation is really bad.
You do not run away every time things get a little rough. You keep trying until something gets resolved or there is nothing left to do or say. As talk show host Dr Phil McGraw has said many times, ‘relationships are 100/100, not 50/50.’ Both partners must give it their all at all times if they really love each other.
When there is a problem in the relationship, talk to your partner, not everyone else.
Do not run to your mother or best friend the moment things turn sour. Love and respect your partner enough to work on your issues inside the relationship. If you are not careful, family and friends will start to disapprove and tear your relationship apart. After all, what are they supposed to think if all you talk about are the low points?