By Natalie Claire King
This is what happened. You met each other. You liked each other. And so, you’ve been hanging out with each other. But are you like, going out with each other?
A committed couple or flirtatious fling, here are a few indicators to solve your dating dilemmas.
10. About Time
It started with one date, and then two and then you were off on a saucy weekend away together. Fast-forward and it’s been three months since the two of you hooked up via Tinder/competed in a dance-off at Drop It Like It’s Hot/were set-up by that persistent mutual friend. Three months. That’s long enough for you to start calling each other boyfriend and girlfriend, right? While most might agree, others may see three months dating as a mere three-day fling. You may be confident this amount of time is a sign that they’re ready to kick things into full gear, but in actual fact, they may need a little longer. If it’s been six months to a year then things are certainly getting serious and you should be allowed to call yourselves an item.
9. Day-to-Day Communication
A text message here, a tweet there, and a phone call every other day — the two of you have been conversing like smitten teenagers. Whether it’s through social media, mobile phones or romantic handwritten notes, everyday communication is certainly an indication your admirer actually likes you. However, be mindful your sassy suitor is not all flirt with no follow up.
8. Definite Date or Booty Call Bother
Dining out, trips to the movies and the odd picnic in the park, you guys are definitely a dating duo. Oh wait, you rarely leave the bedroom? You only hear from them a) for a late night summons b) when they’re drunk c) after dinner or d) all of the above? Unless you also, are treating them in the same manner and are quite content with this situation, then please continue. However, if you would like to turn your bedroom shenanigans into a slightly more serious state of affairs, you need to change tactics, and if they object…leave them in your dust.
7. Just Friends
Slowly but surely, you’ve met the friendship group. They have liked you enough to introduce you to those who are closest to them and get their approval. Play this one well and you’ll be that much closer to locking them down.
6. A Family Affair
You’ve been invited to meet the family. It’s a bold move and one that indicates they’re letting you in. Whether it’s an informal gathering or a sit-down dinner, introducing a date to the family is hell scary but a big step towards being a couple.
5. Getting Intimate on the Internet
It’s not official, until it’s Facebook official. Okay, that might not be true; however, I did once have a guy ask me out using the line, “Can I change my Facebook status from ‘single’ to ‘in a relationship’?” Slightly corny, yet a teensy bit cute. Clearly if they have changed their online status, they want the World Wide Web (a.k.a. everybody) to know their taken and are now with you. It can just get a little awkward when the relationship starts to fizzle…
4. Sharing is Caring
You’ve packed up the contents of your life and are saying bon voyage to the overbearing parents/creepy roommate/living solo with five cats, and are moving in together. Or alternatively, week-by-week you have been accidentally leaving a trail of your belongings at their pad and haven’t really left since you first stayed over — you’re practically living together! Nothing says, “we’re a couple” like sharing a living space and lamenting the loss of your complete privacy.
3. Great Expectations
Your diary reads: Wednesday, picking up Daniel’s mum from airport; Friday, attending Daniel’s cousin’s 30th birthday party; Sunday, attending Veronica’s wedding together. It’s unspoken but between the two of you lies certain expectations, like helping out family members and attending friends’ celebrations. You’re a couple, that’s what it’s all about.
2. Words Speak Louder Than Actions
Sorry, what was that? You were just casually introduced as the girlfriend/boyfriend? Love it or hate it, whether you were asked or not, you are in a relationship. And anyone you are further introduced to this evening will be quickly informed of the fact.
1. We Need To Talk
Having The Talk is uncomfortable and slightly intimidating but it really must be done. If you haven’t discussed what you both want, feelings can get hurt and actions misunderstood. Assumptions should never be made, and quite frankly, honesty is the best policy.